Worthless Motivation

It was while I was oh so young.
Listening to kids songs being sung,
That it all really started,
My fatherhood had just begun.

Hearing you come in late at night,
With that drunk shyt in plain sight.
Cussin and fussin with your dumb ass,
Trying to start a fight.

So you hit her to keep her "in line",
Too young to know what was on your mind,
But your weak, insecure ass never seen,
That she gave you all of her, all the time.

Then you left us, packed up, and was out,
But you still figured you had some clout.
So kept coming around the house,
Yellin and screamin, and runnin your dumb ass mouth.

But there came the turning day,
In the house, you made your way,
You hit my mom repeatedly,
But a word I could not say.

You turned and looked in my eyes,
The expression I could not disguise,
But your ass knew by the look that I gave,
that the next time your ass would die.

You stayed away the rest of our child years,
With me, My brother shared all his tears.
And while I hated your weak, bytch ass,
Losing you is what my baby bro feared.

Its a shame that I already knew,
But the older my baby bro grew,
He would see for himself your false words
And broken promises continued to hold true.

See you were never really around,
To hear our crys or goofy little sounds.
But it was made up in my mind,
To not let history repeat or be rewound.

I hate to admit it but its true,
Its all because of you,
I'm the man I am today,
By being the exact opposite of you.

Its not a hard choice for me,
To raise Angel and little T,
I'm sure you have no clue,
How much they mean to me.

In closing I will say,
You are worthless in all but one way.
You made me realize when raising mines,
Being their dad is what's best at the end of the day.

I never stopped the saturation
Of the feelings of hate and aggravation.
But the love I get from Angel and Junior
Will always be what drives me.
Not my father's Worthless Motivation.

Tyrone D. Allen Sr.